Won't You Please Take My Hand?
by TheLovelyJudy
Summary: Pansy has spent most of her time at Hogwarts under Draco Malfoy's control, deluding herself into thinking that he loves her even though he does nothing but hurt her. So what happens when she develops an unexpected and beautiful friendship/love with Hermione Granger? Can Hermione show Pansy her own strength and self-worth, or is it too late for Pansy? PP/HG & PP/DM (6th year)
1. Friendship Blooming

Summary: When Hermione stumbles upon a heart broken and distressed Pansy Parkinson and decides to offer comfort, a friendship and perhaps something more blooms. Pansy/Hermione & Pansy/Draco,

Story's Theme Song: **I can't help falling in love-Ingrid Michealson**

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Her heart is breaking, wait…no. That's not the right word, shattering into a billion pieces is more like it. But she knows it's her fault completely, she's nothing but the Slytherin whore (she cringes at the nickname) and she should never have expected or hoped that he would see her as more, that he would see her intelligence and wit, her talent and humor. She's a bitch because she's angry and hurt and broken, she breaks into a thousand pieces every time he makes love to her because even though the sex its self is mind blowing he doesn't love her, but he knows she loves him and he takes advantage. He whispers to her while he rocks against her, that she is beautiful and so lovely.

And he barely acknowledges her existence otherwise.

Pansy knows she's playing the part of the annoying clingly bitch, the desperate girlfriend but she can't help herself from freaking out when she sees him with another girl or when he ignores her. She's loved him for so long, with every fiber of her soul. So she keeps on letting him hurt her, hoping that someday he'll see that he belongs with her and only her. The title this school has stamped on her, Slytherin Whore, is ironically false; she lost her virginity to Draco in her 5th year (He hadn't been very gentle at all, only concerned for his own pleasure and she'd cried but he never gave a word of comfort. But two weeks later he bought her a diamond bracelet for her birthday…)

She'd only ever given herself to Draco, loving their rendezvous and deluding herself into thinking that he was not fucking her, no, but making love to her. But the rose would shrivel up and blacken the moment he left; reality would strike without mercy each and every time. He did not love her. She wants to grab him by the shoulders and shake him hard, she wants to scream and cry and plead loud so that he and everyone else in this school can hear her.

_Love me! Please, please love me!_

Pansy walks over to him, he's pretending to read some article from the Daily Prophet but she can tell he's not because he hasn't flipped the page once for six minutes and he's a much faster reader than that. She sits across from him, it is their 6th year and he's even more stunning than last year. "Hello Draco" she greets, softly. He rolls his eyes up to look at her, his voice monotonous and cold; "Pansy" before he returns to his ignored article. "Draco…I'm going to Honey Dukes later today…would you care to come? I-I'll pay for you, if you want" the last part makes him look up with a raised eyebrow. "I'm sure I can afford it" to which Pansy blushes because she remembers, _oh yeah. Draco's filthy rich._ But it doesn't stop the rush of hope that wash over her, is he implying that he wants to go?

Fiona Corberg, a fourth year Ravenclaw, moves in and wraps her arms around him from behind. Draco shrugs her off but turns around to face her; His voice are honey but his intentions less than innocent. "My, don't you look ravishing today, Fiona" with a pang she realizes that this is how he got her in bed, how he got a lot of girls in bed. He groomed them, as it were. And believe it or not, she herself had been his longest conquest, took him three weeks to nail her.

She'd been too shy, too innocent and now it almost hurt that she couldn't say that anymore. Pansy almost wishes she could take it back from him and lock it inside a music box for safe keeping or maybe between the pages of a fairy tale book. But Merlin help her, Pansy loves him. Nobody believes that, but Draco knows very well and he uses her as a vessel for his needs and sometimes frustrations. She belongs to him, heart body and soul. He belongs to nobody, especially not her. And she knows hers is not the first heart he has broken. Not by a long shot. Draco is leaving with Fiona and Pansy knows what they're going to do. There is a strange pressure building up inside of her, tears blur her vision.

Today is her birthday

And he's going to spend it fucking Fiona Corberg?

"Draco! Could you please come with me to Honeydukes? It's my birthday and I really want to spend it with you" she tries, loud enough to the Slytherin table to hear and stop to listen. Draco lets go of a now annoyed girl and walks over to her, stopping just a few inches from her. He towers over her. "If you wanted shag, just ask Pansy. But I have other matters to get to first" he sneered the last part, loosening his tie and winking at Fiona. "I don't want that, I just want you to spend some time with me" she pleads softly. She's been sincere, she wants to laugh with him and talk about things and have a good time.

Fiona sighs loudly, impatiently. "You're being a cock block Pansy" he snarls, and tears spring to her eyes. "I'm sorry, I'm not trying to be" to which he rolls his eyes and leaves her standing there. She can't stop herself. "Are you cheating on me?" he stops and turns around, "What the hell are bitching about Pansy?" he says, exasperated and annoyed. He mutters a "sorry baby" to his less than happy fuck-buddy. "What I mean is, are we dating? This relationship is really confusing for me Draco, you tell me how special and beautiful I am in bed but then you…you go off with other girls. Do you care about me, even a little bit? Because I care about you a lot, please Draco. Please don't go with her, please? Can't you just spend the day with me?"

"Oh come on, Pansy, you and I both know the only thing you're good for is a quick fuck. I would never date you, I have more dignity that that. Thank you very much. However, I can give a very nice birthday present later today" he sneers, waiting for her to melt like she always does. "I don't want you to fuck me, I want you to love me…only me. But I uh…I see that isn't going to happen. Please don't touch me, ever again." Draco barks out a dry laugh. "Oh is my touch repulsive?" "Far from it, that's why it's so awful. You touch me like you love me, but you don't and you never have. It hurts too much"

"Merlin, Pansy…well, when you stop being such a dramatic little bitch; you just come crawling back like you always do, darling" he spits out the word and before she knows what she's doing, Pansy slaps him hard across the face. She doesn't wait for his reaction or response, she runs away and doesn't stop until she reaches the library, Pansy rushes in and—thinking that she's alone—presses her back against a book shelf and slowly slides down as the sobs begin. She's never been a loud obnoxious crier, and the only sounds that escape are occasional hiccups and muffled sobs of emotional pain.

"Parkinson?" a voice says, careful and familiar. She looks up and tries to switch into her bitch mode but she can't. "Granger" she says softly, waiting for this girl who she's spent year making fun of to turn the tables on her during this vulnerable state. But Granger crouches down, "I know we're not friends but…are you okay?" those words, are you okay? Break down her brick walls and she blurts it all out—everything. She spends nearly half an hour just blurting it out while Hermione listens sympathetically. "I don't think you should be with him, Pansy. You're right, it's only hurting you"

"But I love him, Hermione…" she can't remember the exact moment they switched to first name basis but she likes it. "It hurts to be apart from him just as much as it does to be with him, sometimes I wish I was eleven again. Life was so much simpler back then, and Draco was a lot more nicer…to me that is" Hermione moved to sit next to her. And before Pansy knew it the conversation started taking a new route, a happier route. She told Hermione about her love and fascination for unicorns, to which Hermione started on a tangent about their history and all that.

The Gryffindor Princess and the Slytherin Whore, sitting close together and—Hermione grabbed her hand and their fingers fit perfect, a silent gesture of friendship—Pansy felt sweet warmth inside her heart.

"Happy Birthday, Pansy"

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And that's a wrap for now. I hope you enjoyed it; I enjoyed writing it even if it is sad.

**Please Review! **

**AN: **There will be romance between Hermione and Pansy later in the story but I don't think it's realistic at all to jump right into it. Pansy is deeply in love with Draco (sorry he's such a jerk in this) and it takes time for us to get over something like that. I hope they're not too out of character, besides of course that fact that they're friends now and that's very out of character XD

-I hope you had a beautiful holiday!

Corina


	2. Vanilla & Strawberries

AN: Thanks so much Decepticon-silverstreak, Guest, Icris, and T for your kind reviews! And thank you everyone who favored and followed this as well. I hope you enjoy this, please tell me your thoughts PS: I don't think you're being rude at all, T, it's very flattering that you want me to update asap :3

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Hermione sat with her legs tucked under her, listening with rapt attention to every hurt Draco Malfoy had caused for the "Slytherin whore" and Pansy was even brave enough to tell her about the first time they had sex. How he'd been cold, not violent or anything, but still cold and detached. How she'd felt completely used and hurt, how he'd said nothing of comfort when he broke her hymen and she cried out in pain. Hermione had instinctively wiped away a few stray tears, a gesture that made Pansy flinch slightly for it was unexpected but she didn't move to get away from her, on the contrary she smiled and shifted closer to the know-it-all bookworm.

As she spoke Pansy remembered it too clearly and she admitted to Hermione that she often found herself confused by how she felt about it, "Sometimes I feel like he raped me but…he didn't, I never said no and I never struggled…I mean it's not like he cuffed me to a bed, you know? He just wasn't very nice and I felt so empty and sad afterwards" to which Hermione and wrapped her arms around the other girl in a side-hug to comfort her. Pansy had told her about that first time in tight cramped whispers.

_He was kissing her and it felt so good, she couldn't think properly. Her mind was turning to mush, nothing made sense and she loved him—yes, she loved him. Pansy had never felt like this before, it must have been love right? Draco was the first boy who made her feel beautiful and special, he'd been telling her how gorgeous she was for a few weeks now and opening doors for her and—oh he was such a gentleman! He forced his hand up under her shirt and squeezed a breast. Pansy broke away with an almost frightened gasp, "What are…" she started but he pulled her back to him and pushed her onto her back. "I'm about to rock your world" he rasped, kissing her neck._

"_W-Wait, Draco…I'm a virgin" she admitted sheepishly. "Don't worry, I'll take care of you" he drawled lazily, flipping her pleated skirt up. Pansy felt a torrent of emotions slam into her violently; fear, confusion, uncertainty, helplessness, excitement, love. Part of her wanted her to scream and push him away before it was too late but the other part of her, the part that unfortunately was winning, wanted to lose her virginity to the boy she loved; he would be gentle. He would be sweet and it would be beautiful, right? She tried to tell him to please be gentle but he kissed her hard on her lips and shoved himself inside of her. Pansy screamed, tears rolled down her face._

_Draco didn't kiss them away, he paused for only a moment and never asked if she was okay. He moved above her, heavy and cold. Pansy was waiting for the pleasure to take over but it never came, there was only pain and oh—wait…something else but not pleasure…a strange numb feeling. Pansy's face was buried in his collarbone as he pushed into her over and over, she was so horribly confused. This was not rape was it? She didn't say no, she didn't fight him._

_So why did she feel so dirty and used and ashamed and hurt?_

_The pain, the numbness was too much to handle and she opened her mouth to…to what? To scream…to tell him to stop, please stop, he was hurting her so badly. She whimpered up at him, and he was finished. He climbed off of her and winked at her, leaving without another word. Pansy cried herself to sleep._

Hermione was shaking with anger; she'd tried to be both gentle and firm in her response to Pansy's monologue. "What he did to you was disgusting—no don't try to defend him—it was disgusting. Most people think that if a girl just doesn't say no or stop it means it wasn't rape; but you were crying Pansy and not showing any signs of pleasure and he didn't have the goddamn decency to slow down and make sure you were comfortable."

She'd said it all in the same manner that she might answer a question in class. "But I continued to do it, Hermione. I even sought him out, and by the third or fourth time it actually did feel good…but no matter how good it felt I always felt empty afterwards…used. Merlin, I'm pathetic" to which Hermione had scolded in an almost motherly way, "Don't you say that. Don't you dare, Pansy…I'm sorry to ask this but…were your parents affectionate?"

"They didn't abuse me" Pansy defended and it was true, they'd never once hit her (they were hardly ever around anyway) but Hermione put up her hands, "That's good, but I'm asking if they were loving, did your father tell you how pretty you were? Did your mother hug you and braid your hair?" Pansy's eyes had filled with tears. "No. Never, I remember something Hermione. When I was seven I got scared during a storm, mother was out with a few friends and father was in his work study. I ran to him and wanted him to hold me but he told me to grow up and go back to bed"

"And Malfoy was the first person who made you feel like someone cared. He knew, didn't he, that you wanted to feel loved. And that bastard took advantage, don't let him Pansy. Not anymore."

Pansy, overwhelmed with emotion, stood up and pulled Hermione up at the same time. Then she threw her arms around her former enemy and gave her a bone crushing embrace. "Thank you my wonderful know-it-all" she teased kindly as Hermione returned the hug with just as much power. "I'm sorry about everything. About the way I treated you and everyone else. I was just…I was angry all the time and I didn't know how to deal with it and there was nobody…" Hermione cut her off. "It's alright Pansy. And don't worry, now you have somebody."

"Happy Birthday Pansy"

Now Pansy is heading back to her dorms, passing by students who have "POTTER STINKS" pins glaring from their ties, most of them are Slytherins. "Hey Pansy, have a pin" Millicent offers but Pansy shakes her head no. They all stare at her confused, Parkinson passing up on an offer to mock the chosen one? The sworn enemy of her beloved beau Draco Malfoy? Pansy feels hot with fear, and she wishes she could make a powerful speech about how this fight between Slytherin & Gryffindor is rubbish, how she's realized that it doesn't and shouldn't matter but Pansy isn't as brave as Hermione.

She's so scared of being shunned, hated by her friends (wait…are they friends?) "I can't very well have his disgusting name ruining my robes can I?" she blurts out, and this satisfies them. Draco is walking up from around the corner, his hair messy and his tie askew. Pink kiss marks on his jawline and neck. She feels her heart close like a tight fist. _Don't cry, girlie, don't you dare cry. _He smiles. Oh Merlin, have mercy that smile. It's that smile that makes her knees cave in. "Hello gorgeous" he drawls.

"Draco" she squeaks. She was unable to move, to get away from him, her beautiful dream and worst nightmare. "Do you still want to go to Honey Dukes or whatever? Janine cancelled our date so I'm free" those words snap something inside her. She jabs a finger into his chest, her voice low and dangerous. "I am so sick of you _Malfoy. _I'm sick of the way you treat me…" "Pansy, Baby…" "Shut up! I'm talking and you're listening, ferret. You do nothing but hurt and use me and I won't put up with it, not anymore. You will never touch me again, you're selfish and spoiled and mean. You're so mean! And I was too, Merlin I was a downright bitch. No more, we are finished"

Everyone around them is silent, too shocked to even mutter a syllable. Did Pansy Parkinson just dump Draco Malfoy the sex God? This week alone he'd shagged five girls, two at the same time (Fuck Yeah). He was infamous for getting girls in his bed, the very idea that one—especially Pansy—should deny him is strange indeed. Draco looks shocked for a moment but suddenly grabs her wrist in a bruising grip. "What makes you think you can talk to me like that?" he growls dangerously. Pansy tries to pull her grip away but he's too strong. "Let me go. I'll scream. I'll scream so loud" Blaise steps up, he actually sort of likes Pansy—she's a bit extreme sometimes but she's smart and funny. He doesn't love her, he couldn't even he wished it.

He silently praised her in his mind, _Right on girl. _"Draco she's not worth it. I know for a fact that Gabriella Richards from Hufflepuff is desperate for some Draco lovin' mate. She's a ten, this bitch is a seven" Draco smirks and lets go, "You're right Blais' Merlin knows she'll come crawling back with her legs spread anyway. Maybe I'll be nice and take you back, Pansy" Blaise mouths to her, "Sorry" and she gives him a small sad smile, she knows it's hard to stand up to Draco. But that doesn't mean his words don't sting deeply. Or the fact that Draco agreed with him.

Hermione knows how Pansy is feeling, establishing a friendship could have a vicious backlash. Ron freaked out when she got involved with someone from another school, how would they react if she told them that she'd made peace with the mean Queen of Slytherin? She sneaks smiles and small waves at the other girl and is relieved to see they are returned. They aren't walking around arm in arm but these quick smiles remind each other that they haven't forgotten that day in the library.

Now they are all in Slughorn's first potions class. Pansy is standing next to Draco, who has his arm wrapped around her waist in a possessive grip. But it's obvious that Pansy is annoyed, trying every once in a while to move away only to be dragged back to his side. He is pissed, the bitch humiliated him in front of his friends. He's showing her and them that he is the one in control of this _relationship_ (he sneers the word inside his mind) on the other side of the room reside the Gryffindors. Saint Potter and the Weasle are late but of course, know-it-all Granger is there.

And of course the bitch has to name all of the potions and what they do. She's talking about the love potion, and he's barely listening. Hermione is lost in her own world now as the scent reaches her, "for example I smell…fresh strawberries and…vanilla" the sound of Slughorn clearing his throat snaps her out of it. _What just happened?_ Hermione wonders as she steps away, neither Ron nor Harry smell anything like strawberries or vanilla. The scent is distinctly feminine.

As the students move about to reach their assigned seats, Pansy passes Hermione and sneaks a quick hand-hug that nobody else sees. Hermione squeezes back and sits with Ron and Harry who have just come in. A certain scent hangs in the air and she breathes it in deeply, relishing in its' sweetness. It is now, as she starts on her potion that she realizes.

Pansy smells like strawberries and vanilla.

Does that mean she likes her? No, it couldn't be…Hermione isn't a lesbian. She doesn't have any problems with gay people, Merlin no. She has a gay muggle friend and he's wonderful, his boyfriend is wonderful to and they make a great couple. But for some reason the thought that she may have feelings for another girl is terrifying. She's never felt this before, not even for Ron. But she can't help it, the tingles that rise up and down her spine whenever Pansy smiles at her.

Hermione is so distracted she messes up on the assignment.

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I _really_ hope you guys are enjoying this

**Please, Please Review!**

_Pansy & Hermione's Soundtrack:_

Can't Help Falling in Love: Ingrid Michaelson

Close to You: The Carpenters

Count on Me: Bruno Mars

Make You Feel my Love: Adele

Song Bird: Naya Rivera (Santana Lopez on Glee)

On top of the World: The Carpenters

Arms: Christina Perri

Thousand Years: Christina Perri

_Draco & Pansy's Soundtrack:_

Wide Awake: Katy Perry

Take a Bow: Rihanna

You Don't own Me: Lesley Gore

Survivor/I will Survive: Santana & Mercedes (Glee)

Jar of Hearts: Christina Perri

Fighter: Christina Aguilera

Impossible: Shontelle


	3. Her Laughter

Thanks so much Decepticon-Silverstreak and Miracles79 and Guest for your wonderful reviews. And I'd like to take this moment to give a warning; there will _possibly_ be an attempted rape scene in the future, but no full on rape scenes because I don't want this story to be about that. Have a beautiful day my loves :)

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**I can't decide if I'll let you**

**Save my life or if I'll drown**

**I hope that you see right through**

**My walls**

**I hope that you catch me**

**Because I'm already falling**

**I'll never let a love get so close**

**You put your arms around me**

**And I'm home**

_-Christina Perri, Arms_

They meet in the library, a quick but sincere hug is shared before they sit next to each other. If anybody asks they'll say they're stuck together for a project and Pansy will throw an insult or something to keep up appearances. But they are getting sick of it, they want to be open their friendship not hide it. Pansy is grateful towards Hermione for being the first person to show that she cared, even though Pansy spent these previous years teasing Hermione, in a sincere manner. Nobody really notices that the hostility between them isn't strong like it used to be, nobody notices the quick smiles and the playful winks.

Hermione is walking with Harry and Ron when Pansy passes them (strawberries and vanilla) and Ron mutters to her angrily, "Merlin she's annoying, huh 'Mione?" Hermione glares at him so viciously that he cringes, confused by her reaction. "Who are you to judge her anyway Ronald? You don't even know her" Ron snaps out of his confusion and glares at her. "And you do?" he sneers, Harry stands by Ron's side (as usual) and glares at Hermione to. "Actually, yes, we made peace. Is that so bad?"

"With a slytherin yes. With Draco Malfoy's personal whore, hell yes" Ron growls, Hermione slaps him hard across the face. "How dare you call her that, and you Harry…you agree with him? Pansy's not a horrible person; trust me I thought she was but…she's just been hurt and she's been getting hurt for years now, she didn't have anybody to turn to and it made her bitter. I wish you would give her chance but I can tell you won't. I'll always love you both but no matter what you say I will always care for her and be there for her when she needs me."

She turns on her heel and knocks right into Draco Malfoy. Who looks livid and actually quite frightening, "so you're the reason Pansy's being such a bitch" he snarls. Harry instinctively moves to protect Hermione from a dangerous Malfoy, despite the fact that he's still upset over her "betrayal" Hermione glares at Draco. "You don't deserve her Malfoy" she spits at him, her angry gaze never once faltering. Draco hits her, so hard the sound echoes in the hallway; not even a split second later a form crashes into Draco from the side.

Pansy

Draco is much stronger than her of course but the shock is enough to render him helpless on the floor while the rain of blows befalls him, most of them with a heavy book. The Golden Trio is frozen, Hermione's face is still stinging, she doesn't move to stop it even though she knows she really should because this has gone beyond Draco slapping her, Pansy is releasing years of pent up anger, hurt, and agony that has been a direct effect of her relationship with Malfoy. It's not until a dry sob slips from her that Hermione moves forward and pulls her away.

Malfoy knows he's too weak to fight Ron and Harry so he spits a wad of blood at the two girls and limps away to the hospital wing. Hermione is hugging Pansy tightly, the latter not sobbing but shaking like she wants to cry but she's too exhausted. "Parkinson…um…Pansy, that was really awesome" Harry says gently, daring to put his hand on her shoulder. Ron remains rooted the spot. Pansy's face is still buried in Hermione's shoulder, her frame isn't shaking as hard but it seems that she's not letting go anytime soon.

Hermione doesn't mind.

"Merlin Hermione, I'm sorry he…he hit you and that's only the beginning…everyone is going to turn against us, and…I don't understand why" She mumbles almost incoherently while Hermione switches their embrace into a one armed hug and guides her over to one of the study booths. "No matter what happens, I will always be here for you. Do you understand that Pansy?" Hermione is crouched on the floor, looking up at Pansy's tear streaked face.

"I wish I could be as strong as you"

A moment of silence passes, Harry sits across from Pansy to show he's on their side while Ron stays standing in the hallway. Hermione ignores his deathly glare, and focuses on Pansy. "You are strong Pansy, but you've been hurt so badly for so…"

"No. No! Hermione you don't understand, I think…I think I still love him. I-I'm not saying I forgive him for hitting you or anything, Merlin no…never but…I think I still love him and I hate myself for it" Hermione immediately cups the other girl's face with her hand and presses her forehead against hers, a stunningly intimate gesture, both girls ignore the rush that it sends to through their veins (we are just friends, very close friends and nothing more—oh but she smells lovely and her lips—no we are just friends)

"It's okay Pansy, you're only human. Malfoy…I'm not so sure about"

Pansy laughs and Hermione thinks it's adorable.

None of them notices Dumbledore until he's suddenly standing right beside Harry. "I must say, this is a truly pleasant sight. You girls have set a good example and we can only hope your good intentions rub off on your classmates" he puts a hand on Pansy's shoulder and gives it gentle and fatherly squeeze. Pansy feels a pang of guilt for all the crap she's said behind his back, she never disliked him to be honest. She simply followed the crowd, followed Draco.

Dumbledore is a pretty cool dude, actually.

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**Please Review!** It would make me most happy indeed.

Hermione slaps Ron, Draco slaps Hermione, Pansy slaps Draco...POOR Harry is always left out D; (Haha)


	4. Trapped with a Monster

**Warning: Attempted Rape Scene (Semi-Graphic)**

Thank You Miracles79, Decepticon-Silverstreak, Guest, and Dragoncilia for reviewing!

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When the rain is blowing in your face

And the whole world is on your case

I could offer you a warm embrace

To make you feel my love

_**-Adele, Make You Feel My Love**_

Ron is refusing to speak to Hermione, glaring at her and muttering "traitor" under his breath whenever she passes. Harry is torn between them but is still nice towards her; merely standing by with an uncomfortable expression whenever Ron decides to rip into her or Pansy. But Harry has never done this himself; smiling at Pansy even Hermione is nowhere in sight, and she smiles back. She stops him in the hallway, "Hey Harry…can we talk?"

Harry hesitates and looks around, Pansy rolls her eyes at him "God Potter I'm not going to eat you I just want to talk, please?" and he feels a bit silly for his reaction, Harry follows her without hesitation this time into an empty classroom. "It's about Hermione" Pansy starts, "Is she okay? Is she hurt?" "She's fine, don't worry" she reassures him. Pansy can't help but feel a pang of jealousy and admiration at his immediate concern for Hermione. And it hurts her to know Draco would never react the same way.

"I need to tell you a secret…a very important secret, I want to share it with you because…apart from Hermione you're the most decent person I know. Harry…I think I might love Hermione in the way that…I'm supposed to love boys. It's just, when I'm with Hermione…it's magical. I feel like laughing because I'm so happy I have her, and I feel like sobbing because I'm so afraid of losing her. And when I was with Draco I…I would walk around so angry and heartbroken all the time. I didn't realize how wonderful it can feel…being loved like that. Merlin, this is stupid. I'm not gay, I can't be…I've never felt this way about another girl before"

The Chosen-One is staring at her wide eyed but his expression softens into a gentle smile as she continues, he knows what this feels like being overjoyed and terrified at the same time, he feels that way about Luna. Pansy is looking at him, "Say something…anything please" she mumbles, afraid of his reaction.

"I don't think gender should stop love, love is…more powerful than that. Hermione is the first person to be decent and kind towards you without expecting anything in return…she's brought out the beauty inside of you Pansy, your strength and wit that Malfoy has spent years pushing down just so he could brag about having you under his thumb. That wasn't love Pansy, he did nothing but hurt and embarrass and use you. Hermione is the opposite, it's no wonder you're developing those feelings for her."

"Draco loved me…he…he wasn't always so bad, God Potter you just…you don't know him!" Pansy stands up, not knowing why she's going off on him. Wait, yes she does. There is a part of Pansy who wants _desperately_ to believe that Draco Malfoy loves her, he is all she's ever known. Pansy is afraid of admitting that he does not and never did love her back. She's afraid of admitting that she loves Hermione because…what if Hermione doesn't love her back?

Pansy is so terrified right now.

"He…He was right Harry…he's always been right…I'm worthless, the only thing I'm good for is a quick shag. And Hermione is…I don't deserve her. I don't deserve to be loved like that" Harry does something that he never thought he would do, not a billion years. He pulls her into a hug, a fierce embrace that tells her to shut up in the nicest way possible. She trembles against him, trying to hold back the tears instinctively; memories of Draco flashing across her mind.

"_What the hell are blubbering about now?"_

"_Y-You're hurting me, please can we just…can we slow down a bit?"_

"_Be quiet Pansy. You came to me, asking for sex did you not?"_

"_I did but…do you have to be so rough?"_

"_Shut up Pansy. You're ruining it"_

Harry rubs circles on her back. "Crying doesn't make you weak or annoying, Pansy. It makes you human" he murmurs gently, and the tears flow. "I wanted him to love me so badly!" she sobs almost violently against his chest. He says nothing, just holds her close. "I just…I wanted him to **love** me. Why couldn't he love me? What was **wrong** with me?" this time Harry replied, "Nothing is wrong with you Pansy. Fuck him and the horse he rode in on" Pansy chuckles against him. "That was brilliant Potter"

"If you love Hermione, tell her. I know it's terrifying, not only because she's a girl but also because the last person you fell in love with has done nothing but cause you misery. Hermione is nothing like him, Pansy, we both know that. Just because all you've known is pain, doesn't mean that's all you deserve. And Hermione loves you too, I can see it in the way she looks at you. It's the same way I look at Luna"

"Luna Lovegood? Why don't you ask her out?" Pansy asks, brushing away some stray tears. "I will…someday…never" she hits him playfully, "here you are giving these big speeches; you hypocrite" she teases. And it occurs to her that she's never been alone with a boy; simply talking and laughing and enjoying each other's company in an innocent way. She's never had a male friend, there has only ever been Draco—no need to explain that one—and the other Slytherins who; thinking that she was a whore tried over and over to get into her pants.

But she'd only ever given herself to Draco. Pansy has tried to break it off with him in the past, each time less than successful.

"_Come on Pansy Baby, you don't mean that"_

"_Yes I do. I'm tired of you Draco, I…what are you doing?"_

"_Taking off my clothes, what does it look like?"_

"_Stop that. No, don't…please don't kiss me like that."_

"_Why not, darling?"_

"_Because you're making me fall in love with you again and I…I don't want to"_

"_Shh, let Draco make it all better."_

And it was those times that he would be sweet to her, touch her with those sinfully wonderful hands and she became putty. Hours of touching, kissing, and whispering to her how beautiful she was. _"Say you're mine Pansy. I want to hear you say it, love" _and she would always comply. Relishing in this moment, but she knew even then that it would not last; this vicious cycle would repeat itself over and over again. A roller coaster ride that she could not get off of.

"We should probably get of here, I reckon Hermione's sick with worry" Harry says, breaking through her thoughts. Pansy nods in agreement and follows him out, "Tell her I'll be there in a minute. I need to get something" Harry quickly nods and hurries down the hallway. Pansy is jogging lightly down the opposite hallway when someone grabs her, strong and tight. An arm around her waist and a hand over her mouth, muffling her scream; she pulled into a broom closet. This person spins her around to face him and slams her into the wall.

Draco.

"So what now? You're a dyke, is that it love?" he growls at her, Pansy tries to push past him but he slams her back into the wall. She can't stop herself form crying out. "Maybe you've forgotten what it's like, being with a man. Is that it, Pansy? Should I help you remember?" Pansy shakes her head no, unable to speak due to her fear. She knows first-hand how violent Draco can be. He grabs the back of her thighs and forces her legs around his waist. "No! I don't want this, please" she blubbers, struggling against him as he pushes his body into hers.

When he forces a hand between them and pushes a finger into her dry sex, Pansy snaps. She starts to kick at him and scream like she's being murdered with a chainsaw. Draco grunts in surprise and frustration, but easily overpowers her. And before she knows what's happening, Pansy is on the ground with him on top of her. She is in a broom closet with him and he is stronger than her, a thousand times stronger it seems and there is no escape.

And as he pushes up her skirt, as she fights him and loses and sobs and he smirks at her…

Hermione and Harry are waiting for Pansy to show up, Ron is glaring at his food like he wants to murder it or something. "She's taking an awful long time" Hermione murmurs to Harry, "I'm sure she's fine. You worry too much Mione, course that's why I love you but still" he winks at her. Hermione laughs, and nudges him. "Yes Harry. We will marry and have beautiful babies" Harry pretends to be horrified at the idea of marrying Hermione. As Hermione and Harry tease each other…

Pansy is trying to crawl away from Draco, and he easily drags her back towards him. "Draco leave me alone! Please!" she wails, fighting even though she's exhausted and bruised from being slapped and manhandled by him. This is her third attempt at escape, the first time ended with her being pinned to the ground and the second ended in a vicious backhand. "Aw come now, sweetheart, don't be like that. You _always_ want it. You're lucky I'm even touching you, you filthy blood traitor dyke"

She sees her wand, just a few feet away. And before he can react she snatches it up and points it up at him, screaming loud enough to wake the dead. "Stupefy" the spell hits him immediately of course and he falls on her, limp. He is heavy and Pansy struggles to push him off of her, after a few minutes she does and stands up trembling, wanting nothing more than to run away from this place. In her hurry something catches on her foot and she falls. Screaming because; in her irrational terror; what if that's Draco's hand? What if something went wrong with the spell?

But it's not. He is still face down on the ground, the spell will wear off in fifteen minutes or so. Pansy hurries out. Hugging herself and trying to hold in her tears, though her eyes are blurred. She walks down the hallway towards the great hall when she sees Harry and Hermione walking towards her. Pansy freezes in the spot, looking like a wounded puppy. She is so ashamed and scared and…shaken.

He tried to…oh God. Hermione is closer now and she realizes that something is horribly wrong. She picks up the pace, and as she comes closer Pansy falls apart. Falling forward into the other girl's arms; crying so hard that she couldn't make a sound even if she wished it, the kind of crying that is so intense and shaking that it's hard to breathe properly. Hermione is frightened, and angry because it's obvious that someone has hurt her, her Pansy is all bruised and scared and trembling.

Pansy isn't ready to tell her or Harry what Draco tried to do, all she can do right now is sob. Hermione seems to know this and doesn't ask her, not yet. After a few long minutes Pansy stops shaking so violently and Hermione takes this opportunity to guide her towards a study booth. "Can you tell me what happened?" she asks her gently.

She shakes her head no, and buries her face in the Gryffindor's neck.

"Just hold me, please"

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	5. Battle Within

AN: This is a pretty dark story, that's where the hurt/comfort genre comes in. Draco causes Pansy's hurt but Hermione will be her comfort. However, Pansy is battling with herself and her journey with Hermione will not be roses and cotton candy. Remember, Draco has had Pansy under his thumb since their 4th year; he has always been controlling and dominating in their "relationship" and in those sort of relationships it's harder than you might think to break free. Even though you are practically screaming at the victim to get away from that person, I hope I portray Pansy's feelings in a realistic and very sad way.

**I am begging you, for the love of Tom Felton covered in caramel—please review.**

**Thank You Miracles79 & Guest for Reviewing**

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"Pansy, you're covered in bruises. It's obvious someone hurt you, can you tell us who?" Harry tries but his attempt to reach the fallen Slytherin Queen seems fruitless. Pansy used to be talented at pretending that everything was perfect (and from the outsider's point of view it was; a mansion, wealth, prosperity, a rich and sexy "boyfriend" and good looks) but here, now, her walls were crumbling away and revealing a severely damaged and broken little girl. Pansy often felt like she was a child playing dress up in her mother's clothes. She doesn't feel sexy or strong or intelligent or powerful. She feels alone, trapped, scared, and lost. _He tried to…I can't believe he would—oh God. I never thought he'd take it that far…he told me back in 4__th__ year that he would never let anyone hurt me…that I was his beautiful flower and his alone…_Pansy shakes her head no and leans her head against the wall opposite of her.

Hermione tucks a strand of dark brown hair behind her ear, "Has this person threatened to hurt you if you tell?" she asks, "No but…I'm still scared" Pansy finally speaks. She stares at her hands in her lap, her skirt isn't around her waist anymore but the crinkles are there, as well as a few rips that signaled an obvious struggle. She closes her eyes briefly, "I was on my way to the Slytherin common room, I wanted to grab something before I met you guys but…on my way, he grabbed me…I tried to scream but he had his hand over my mouth and he pulled me into a broom closet. It was small and he blocked the door, pinned me against the wall…and eventually the floor too. It so small a space…I felt trapped"

Harry takes her hands in his, Pansy flinches and yanks hers away, she remembers Draco's hands so tight around her wrists; bruising her and pinning her down while she cried out and nobody heard her. _He raped—__**NO!**__ He made love to me in 4__th__ year, after the Yule Ball. I never said no, I never fought him or nothing so it wasn't rape. He loved me then, he __**loved **__me. _

_This is my fault, I pushed him over the edge—betraying him like this, I deserved it and more. He told me I was his flower, he told me…Draco would never hurt me—__**He does nothing but hurt me**__. Shut up! Draco is handsome, strong, brave, intelligent, __**terrifying, cruel, heartless, abusive**__ Shut up! He loves me, He loves me, He…promised…he promised he would never let anyone hurt me…he promised he'd always protect me. There are bruises all over me,__** it's not the first time is it Pansy?**_

"Pansy, Pansy darling…please—tell me what happened?" Hermione says, gently taking the other girl's hand and smiling softly when Pansy doesn't flinch. Hermione's hand is small and soft, not big and bone-crushing like Draco's. "I'm so…ashamed, 'Mione" she admits in a small voice, and Hermione realizes that she's never seen the Great Slytherin Queen look so small before. She looks so fragile and scared, it makes Hermione want to hunt down whoever did this to her and beat them with a sledgehammer until they bleed from every orifice and then some.

"There's no reason for that, love. We're best friends you and I, you know that right?" Hermione tells her, Pansy's light up. Best friends? Oh, how lovely that sounds. "Nothing really…he told me I was a blood traitor and let me go…I'm just a bit shaken that's all. I'll be fine" she lies through her teeth. She lies because if she admits it out loud _**"Draco Malfoy, the young man I've been in love with since my fourth yea, the boy who took—I mean who I gave my—virginity in 4**__**th**__** year, the boy who told me he would always protect me, the boy who broke my heart over and over again, the boy who said I was his flower… pulled me into a closet, verbally assaulted me and tried to rape me while I fought and cried"**_

It will be true, it will out there and she will not be able to deny it. She doesn't want to believe that he would do something like that to her, she is—was?...is? his flower, he told her so and really—he isn't always so cruel or frightening. He can be really sweet, honestly! He brought her a bouquet of her favorite flowers (after he broke three of her fingers) and there was the time he spent a whole night just cuddling with her in front of the fire (after she caught him with Alicia Harris and Francesca Moreau; the first from Ravenclaw and the latter from Hufflepuff) oh and the time he had the message "Happy Birthday my beautiful flower" written into the night, the stars enchanted to align correctly before bursting into pink and blue fireworks; her favorite colors (after he forced her to undress in front of him and his mates, harshly criticized her body and embarrassed her)

Draco loved her. He loved her, damn it! And here she was, betraying him! "Oh get off of me, Granger! We are not best friends, we are not friends at all; No—don't touch me, you filthy mudblood" Pansy wants to take it back, she wants to take it all back and wrap her arms around Hermione but she can't—she just can't. Draco loves her and she's so wrong; so wrong to betray him like this. Her own happiness doesn't matter, his voice is locked inside of her head. _You want to make me happy, don't you my flower?...you do? That's my girl, you're so beautiful Pansy…you're my beautiful flower and nobody is ever going to take you away from me. _

Hermione and Harry are frozen, the pain of Pansy's words have not yet sunken into Hermione. _Please don't let her be hurt, let her be angry and vengeful and furious…let her hit me and scream but please don't let her be hurt…I can't handle that._ She doesn't wait around to see their reaction, she runs away. She is torn, torn between something new and beautiful—Hermione and something familiar and frightening—Draco. The answer should be obvious but it is not so. Because if she admits to herself that Draco is nothing but an abusive, controlling, and heartless bully…it will mean that she's never been loved, and that terrifies her. Pansy needs to feel loved, she'll take the bruises and the biting words and the broken fingers as long as she feels like he loves her…her mum and dad don't care about her.

They never comforted her after nightmares, Draco did. He rocked her gently and held her against his strong body, they never wished her happy birthday but Draco had it written in the sky for everyone to see, he bought her a beautiful necklace. He is all she knows, and Pansy is so scared of him.

She sees him, and he sees her. Pansy remembers stupefying him, and he is pissed. He slaps her, hard across the face. _I deserve it_. "I-I'm sorry Draco" she mumbles up at him. He is a thousand feet tall and when he cracks his knuckles she feels like the whole world will explode. "Are you still friends with the mudblood whore?" _don't you dare call her that!_ "No, Draco. I'm so sorry I betrayed you…I'm sorry, please…please forgive me Draco" He smiles at her now, yes…_that _smile. And he pulls her into his arms, "It's alright, my flower…" he called her flower! Pansy sobs and presses her face into his chest, he called her flower! "Come on, I'm going to make love to you"

Pansy goes rigid. And he notices, "I thought you said you were sorry?" he growls against her dark hair. "I-I am" she squeaks, terrified, "You love me; don't you Pansy?" he says in a smooth voice. "I do Draco…I love you with all of my heart" Pansy wonders for a moment if this is true, Hermione's face flashes across her mind. Hermione, gentle and smart and beautiful Hermione; she does not deserve her. "Then let me love you, let me touch you"

Two hours later, Pansy sits on the rim of the bathtub of his bathroom. She covered in more bruises, she feels hollow and sad like she always does after sex with him. He was rough this time, because she betrayed him and the pureblood race, as she sits here the tears blur her vision.

She sinks to the floor, and her quiet muffled sobs don't penetrate through the door. Pansy cries and cries and cries and cries.

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This is probably one of the saddest things I've ever written. I'm sorry 'bout that. I'd love to hear your opinions and thoughts regarding Pansy & Draco's relationship, and Pansy & Hermione's too of course.

Thank You so Much for Reading


	6. There is Blood

**AN: Remember, there was a space of time during the attempted rape scene in which we don't really know what happened (except an escape attempt and a backhand)**

**Thank You so much Guest, Reader, and Guest for Reviewing :) **

**-Reader, I hope your friend made it out okay :( **

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_On the first page of our story_

_The future seemed so bright_

_Then this thing turned out so evil_

_Don't know why I'm still surprised_

_Even angels have their wicked schemes_

_And you take that to new extremes_

**-Rihanna; Our Story**

Two weeks have passed…

A quick spell has healed her broken arm, a severe wound inflicted by Draco after he caught her staring at Hermione. He dragged her to the Slytherin Dorms, into his own room and forced her face down onto the ground. She knew what was coming and she sobbed in terror; he had twisted her arm so slowly she had felt the bones snapping one by one. A silencing charm on the room prevented anyone outside from hearing her blood curdling screams. No amount of screaming, however, would stop him.

This is not the first time he's inflicted such a horrendous wound. Pansy is terrified of him, she knows deep down that this relationship they share is destructive and twisted but when looks at him she sees the Draco who promised to protect her, she sees the boy who held her after nightmares when her own parents never did. Pansy stares at herself in the mirror, but she doesn't see her full breasts or her flat stomach or her long slim legs; she sees the bruises. Flesh colored purple and blue and even yellow and green in some places, old and new.

Destructive and Twisted

The girl in the mirror is trapped, and there is no way out. Pansy reminds herself, _I love him. I love him. I love him. _But a new word pushes through the incantation, _Hermione._ So she shakes her head wildly to clear away the cobwebs and looks back into the mirror. He is waiting for her in his room, she knows they will have sex tonight but she doesn't want to. Fighting him will only make things worse, and he's already brainwashed her to believe it's his right as her "lover"

Her body doesn't belong to her. Why should she have a say in what happens to it?

Pansy secretly hates herself when he brings to an orgasm, each time beautiful in a raw and filthy way. And it makes her feel so ashamed, because she tries so hard to not give in—perhaps he would notice if she didn't or perhaps he would but that's not the point. Pansy wants to prove to herself that on some level, she can defy him but it never works. He sends her over the edge and she tries to leave so she can cry in the bathroom like she always does.

But tonight he doesn't let her go. His breathing is shallow and uneven, his face pressed against the back of her neck. She feels wetness, and she realizes that he is crying. Pansy is overwhelmed with love and pity, and she turns herself around to face him—pushing away all of the bruises and the broken bones and the times he's humiliated her—to kiss his tears away. The smart Pansy (the real Pansy?) knows that he's manipulating her but this Pansy just knows that's not true. Her Drakie-Poo is hurting inside and it's up to her to fix it. (Even if it destroys her in the process, and by it…I mean he)

"Don't ever leave me, I was so lost without you. Please, my flower. Promise me, promise you won't leave me. I won't ever hurt you again"

He has said words like this before. The cycle continues. Pansy snuggles closer to him, feeling sick to her stomach but…he sounds so sad and broken. This time will be different, she tells herself, this time he's telling the truth. This time everything will be beautiful.

Draco is kissing her, and something horrible happens. Something beautiful happens.

She imagines he is Hermione.

And this is absolutely forbidden and wonderful and frightening to her but it's okay, because it's in her own mind and she is safe there. But when a damning phrase slips out of her plump lips, it becomes a death sentence and the room is completely still.

"_Oh, yes Hermione"_

Pansy has no time to react when the first blow strikes her.

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Two Weeks have passed…

Hermione is hurt, confused, suspicious, and furious. The third one just barely overriding the other emotions that are raging inside; Ron is delighted that Pansy is out of their lives and talks endlessly about it. "See Hermione, I told you she was a bitch" and Hermione ignores him, until a disturbing and sickening thought rushes through her. "Ronald tell me the truth. Did you ever do anything to her, anything at all? Even to try and just scare her?"

His confusion is enough for her to know, he is not the attacker. And now it hits her, and she mentally slaps herself from not realizing it sooner. Draco Malfoy. She wonders why it wasn't obvious before, but now—thinking hard about it—she understands. Despite the obvious emotional and even physical abuse he's inflicted on Pansy; Hermione cannot imagine him trying to rape her. Rape is a whole different level of abuse, and Hermione still sees him as nothing but a school-yard bully.

But what does Pansy see?

She is in the library, the more she thinks about Pansy and Draco the more sick she feels. And now she realizes, something in wrong; how she knows doesn't matter. But something is horribly wrong and she feels like she's about to throw up, she is perspiring and she is suddenly terrified. It is the kind of fear that rushes through a child during a violent thunderstorm.

Where is Pansy?

Hermione tries to ignore the feeling, it is silly. Isn't it? She saw them just a few hours ago, Pansy smiling brightly (looking so radiant and beautiful) with his arms wrapped around her waist, kissing her neck and tickling her. He tried to rape her Hermione, and she went straight back into his arms. Why? Because he's had her under his thumb since 4th year, she thinks he loves her. She keeps letting him hurt her. He takes her oxygen, watches her squirm for air and waits until she is on the brink of death before breathing it back into her again. And he keeps doing it, over and over and over…

Need to find Pansy.

She is running towards the Slytherin Dorms, wait…when did she leave the library, she ignores the dirty looks a 3rd year Slytherin gives her and without thinking twice about it: "Imperio" she knows this is wrong but the means justify the ends do they not? And she's not making this young boy do anything horrible, "Tell me the password"

"Serpent Moon"

She is inside two seconds later, bolting past each room until she sees Draco's. She knows it's his because Pansy is sprawled on the floor and…**oh God**…

There is blood everywhere.

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	7. Defense Mechanism

Thank You Decepticon-Silverstreak, Char245, and Miss. for your reviews :D they maketh me very happy so happy I smile like this 8D

There is heavy angst in this chapter, including mentions of self-harm so if you have a history of that please proceed with caution!

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_I hurt myself today_

_To see if I still feel_

_I focus on the pain_

_The only thing that's real_

_The need tears a whole_

_The old familiar sting_

_Try to kill it all away_

_But I remember everything_

_What have I become?_

_My sweetest friend_

_Everyone I know_

_Goes away in the end_

_And you could have it all_

_My empire of dirt_

_I will let you down_

_I will make you hurt_

_I wear this crown of thorns_

_Upon my liars chair_

_Full of broken thoughts_

_I cannot repair_

_Beneath the stains of time_

_The feelings disappear_

_You are someone else_

_I am still right here_

**-Johnny Cash, Hurt**

Pansy wakes up on soft whiteness, something that should be comforting but offers none. As life breathes into her she becomes more and more aware of the inevitable. She failed. She failed being loved, she failed being a pureblood, she failed being a friend, and she failed everything. She failed breathing, she failed cutting herself into pieces, she failed being the invincible Slytherin Queen, she failed being a happy normal teenager. She failed exams and losing her virginity and broom closets and smiles and bruises.

Hermione is sitting beside her, her face buried in a book. Pansy manages a small, private smile. But it fades away, it hurts to smile. Hermione senses something is different, she puts away the book and sees Pansy is awake. "Hi" she says, awkwardly but not unkindly. Pansy says nothing, but her eyes fill with tears. "What are you doing here?" she mumbles, her voice is hoarse. It doesn't hurt to talk but it's not comfortable either. Oh yeah, now she remembers.

She cut her throat with a shard of glass, after she cut her wrists and her stomach and her arms and her legs because she hated herself so much. Ten minutes after she made that final slice, Hermione found her and now here she was. "I wanted to make sure you were okay" Hermione replies. "Well I'm fine, Granger. You can leave" _please don't leave. _Hermione doesn't move, "I saw the bruises Pansy"

"Don't Granger, just don't. I'm fine, I asked you to leave" but Hermione isn't moving, not even an inch.

Hermione is pulling her into her arms, Pansy tries to shove her away but she's so weak. "Piss. Off. Granger" she screeches in an attempt to be threatening but her voice cracks as tears fill her eyes. She is a wounded animal locked inside a cage, desperate for someone to show kindness but so used to cruelty that it lashes out at anybody who gets too close. "He can't hurt you anymore, I promise" Hermione tells her, trying to penetrate through this brick wall that she's build around herself.

_Pansy has no time to react when the first blow hits her…_

_That first blow collided with her upper right cheekbone, just under the eye. So hard it knocked her to the floor with a strangled cry of pain. She was given no time to register the pain of the first blow before what seemed like a thousand more fell upon her, rapidly and with vicious strength. Pansy writhed on the floor as each attack sent shockwaves of physical agony and emotional horror through her entire body, his boot slamming into her jaw repeatedly until it was so damaged that she could no longer scream, his perfectly manicured nails ripping her hair from her scalp so violently that she bled. _

"_You're worthless, Pansy. You've always been and you always will be, but don't kill yourself yet Princess. I wouldn't mind taking you for a ride a few more times" _

_He was on top of her, she pushed at him but he was a thousand pounds of rock and she was a feather. She couldn't even tell him no, she couldn't speak. He was so heavy, he crushed the air out of her and her already fragile bones ached under his power. "She doesn't love you, Pansy. How could anyone love you? You're worthless, d'you hear me sweetheart? You're a waste of space, nobody loves you and nobody ever will. Think about that while I'm using your body for its only purpose, okay my flower?"_

_No! No! No!_

_She tried to say it out loud but she couldn't spit it out, and it didn't matter anyway. For his hand clamped down hard over her mouth, crushing her already broken jawbone. Her eyes rolled back into her head, a horrific parody of an orgasm. Draco sneered down at her, "Stop struggling." But she didn't, if anything she fought back harder. It only excited him more and exhausted her. "You look hideous with your jaw like that" he commented, as if her broken jaw was her own fault. _

_He could have used magic to straighten it out but he wasn't that kind, with a sharp snapping sound her jawbone was back in its place; causing her to give a blood curdling scream of agony which was quickly muffled by his lips. Though her jaw was no longer dislocated, it was still extremely sore and his violent kiss was anything but welcome. "Stupid, worthless, filthy…" with each word he ripped clumps of dark hair from her scalp, she'd often told him that her greatest pride was her hair._

_And he couldn't even leave that part of her alone, now could he?_

_Draco was reaching between them to unzip himself, "No" she mumbled against his mouth; pushing at him with palms of her hands and digging her heels into the carpet to try to get away from him. "You disgusting piece of trash, this is your place Pansy. Never forget that"_

_It was here that something happened, something that seemed natural at the time. "Fuck you Malfoy, and the horse you rode in on" she deadpanned up at him, raising her knee up and slamming it into his groin, he quickly recovered however and grabbed her ankle; twisting it so violently she could not even scream in pain. She crashed to the floor but this time, she fought back with every ounce she had._

_A knock came to the door, Malfoy clamped a hand over her mouth to cut off her cry. "Hey Draco, we have practice down at the field, since Pansy's not here I thought you'd like to come?" Draco smirked, "sure thing, Blais' I'll be out in a moment" then he kissed her mockingly on the forehead. "Don't worry my flower, we're done yet."_

_And then he was gone._

Hermione is holding her, "I didn't cut deep enough" Pansy mumbles; more to herself than to Hermione. But Hermione hears her, "You…you did this to yourself?" the Slytherin meets her eyes and Hermione is horrified by what she sees there. A world of exhaustion, sadness, anger, self-loathing, and hurt buried in her chocolate brown eyes, and she knows that this hurt has been accumulating for a long time.

"What happened?" she asks, sliding off the bed to kneel in front of her. "I cut myself Granger, I wanted to die but you…you just had to play the hero didn't you?" Hermione isn't hurt by Pansy's biting tone, she knows it's a defense mechanism. "Pansy, please" she tries again, and she sees her face soften. "It just hurt so much Hermione…everything hurt and I…I didn't want to feel anything anymore. I wanted the hurt to go away, and it did when…when I was with you but…I didn't deserve that"

"Why?" Hermione tucks a loose strand of hair behind Pansy's ear. Pansy's eyes fill with tears, and her breathing becomes shallow as she tries to keep herself composed. "I-I'm nothing that's why. I'm not smart or beautiful or strong or b-brave, I was a bitch to some of the most kindest people I'll ever meet because I…I thought Draco loved me and…I needed to be loved, I just needed to be so…I ignored all that other bad stuff and…I dedicated myself to him and he…he just hurt me over and over" Pansy is sobbing.

"You deserve to be loved Pansy, truly loved"

"I don't want love! Love has done nothing but hurt me!It humiliated me, controlled me, took over my life, stole my dignity and my s-self respect! It pinned me down and told me I was worthess, tried to rape me…brought me to orgasms that made me feel dirty and used and ashamed. Screw love, screw it all"

Hermione cups Pansy's face. "That was not love Pansy. That was Draco Malfoy. You are strong and beautiful and intelligent and funny and brave, I've seen the real Pansy and she's the greatest thing since sliced bread. I know this…I know this may be a foolish time to do this but I have a confession"

The air is still, filled with their breathing and the hum of the wind outside the window.

"I want to be with you…Pansy. I want to kiss you and hold your hand…I want to tell you how beautiful you are every single day…and I think that's why I've been so angry lately…because I have all these feelings for you that…I've never had for another girl…I don't want to be with Ron or Harry or any of those other guys…I want to be with you. Because when I'm with you Pansy…I feel like I can fly. And there are these butterflies inside my tummy whenever I see you smile, I'm head over heels in love with you…please say you love me too…please?"

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**Please Review!**


	8. The songbirds are Singing

Thanks so much Miss. (No, I don't speak any other language besides English. I'm not that cool, sadly ), Guest, MissWinter, and LauraFlowi

"_Songbird" is from Glee sung by Naya Rivera as Santana Lopez._

Warning: Major Fluffage, I can't help myself!...(Struggles to resist...fails) Sugar Pie, Honey bunch…you know that I love you, I can't help myself! I love you and nobody else…**Hermione: Corina, I think they're waiting for you to st—**I can't help myself! NO, I can't help myself! Cause, sugar pie honey bunch, I'm weaker than a man should be! **Pansy: You're a girl…oh well. Here's the next chapter of "Won't you please take my hand?" don't mind Corina dancing around. **I can't help myself, no I can't help myself!

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Pansy can't breathe a storm of emotions slams into her from a thousand directions. She wants to cry for joy, she wants to dance through the hallways and sing her heart out, and at the same time she wants to run far away, she wants to push it all away from her and rip this feeling—this beautiful and terrifying feeling she had for Hermione—from her chest and bury it a hundred feet into the earth. Her mouth was dry, what would happen if she confessed her love as well? This was not natural, she scolded herself. But it was so horribly wrong, why did it feel so absolutely right?

Why did it feel so natural and good and lovely?

If her relationship with Draco was _natural…_why did she feel so hurt, unappreciated, betrayed and frightened all of the time? Why did she allow herself to be shaped and molded into a monster when she was really a smart, gentle person? Why did she sneer at the people she admired? Why did she forgive him every single time, after the bloody lips and the bruises and the hands covering her mouth when she tried to scream because he was being too rough?

"…I love you too Hermione…but we can't be together"

"I know you're scared Pansy…I understand that but…but we can't just pretend we're only friends…I want so badly to kiss you in front of that bastard Malfoy!" Hermione said the last part with a playful tone, taking Pansy's hands in her own and kissing her knuckles. Pansy smiles, one of her real and rare ones but even then there a hint of sadness. "It'll destroy our social lives…we may lose great friends…the bullying will be merciless Hermione, for both of us…"

The Gryffindor Princess put a slender finger against the Slytherin Queen's lips. "Please Pansy…do I have your permission to kiss you?" tears well in Pansy's eyes as she nods yes, her chest rising and falling with gentle and slightly unsteady movements. This is the first time she's kissing a girl, this is the first time she's kissing someone who loves her back, this is the first time someone has asked her…made sure she wanted something before taking it and leaving her bruised and confused and empty on a carpet.

Hermione scoots closer to Pansy, bracing her hands on either side of the other girl—palms face down on the white sheets of her hospital bed. She gives a tender kiss on her cheek, running her fingers gently up and down her arms. Pansy can't help herself from playing with Hermione's caramel locks, twisting the softness between her fingers and burying her face in the other girl's hair, breathing in her bravery and her kindness and her purity and her sweetness. Hermione presses her forehead against hers, and they breath into each other, Hermione is the first to move a little bit closer.

Their lips are just millimeters apart it seems, when Pansy shifts closer now her upper lip brushes against Hermione's and they both stifle gasps at the electricity that shoots through their veins at such a simple touch. Hermione gently cups the back of Pansy's neck and kisses her, not hard but not soft either—but with a sort of urgency, as if all of the love she feels can only be shown through this moment. It is a kiss that is loving, passionate, sincere and desperate all at once.

Neither of them hear the footsteps approaching them.

Hermione shrieks in surprise when she is yanked backwards by her hair and thrown violently to the floor. Pansy screams, "No!" and Hermione barely has time to register Malfoy towering over her when his boot smashes down on her throat, pinning her down and cutting off her air supply. He smirkes as she claws at his black clad leg and squirms; her eyes filling with tears and her face turning red as she struggles to draw in some air. Pansy is screaming, "Stop! Draco, please! She can't breathe!"

He only presses down harder, Pansy can't move without the stitches ripping. Hermione is a fighter though, and forces herself to remain conscious despite the awful sensation that her head is about to explode and the black dots forming in her vision. She never knew how painful it felt to have your windpipe crushed, the agony of a body fighting for air that is not available to it.

Pansy can't take it anymore, doesn't care about the damn stitches. She throws herself at him, knocking him off balance and over onto the floor. Hermione gasps for air, which tastes sweeter than it ever has. She rolls over, coughing violently and massaging her bruised throat. It hurts a little to breathe but it's still a relief. She hears Pansy, Pansy screaming. Not in pain, not in fear.

The Slytherin Queen is screaming in anger. Pure, almost terrifying rage. Hermione muses to herself that if Pansy was ever that pissed at her, she might actually wet herself with fear, which is saying a lot for the Brave Gryffindor know-it-all.

"—GO ON THEN, MOTHER FUCKER! HIT ME! YOU'RE SUCH A BIG BAD MAN, DO IT!"

There is a dark silence in the room. Draco is glaring at Pansy with so much hatred. He looks ready to kill, but so does Pansy. Pansy's voice is quiet now, but filled with sharp knives. "But it doesn't work for you like that, does it Malfoy? No…No it's much better if I'm scared of you. You like that, don't you? _Oh please Draco, don't hurt me!_ Is that better for you, sweetheart? Does that make you feel like a real man?" Draco cuts in; "Shut your mouth right now, I'm about to fucking smack you"

"And I'll smack you right back! You pathetic arse!"

Draco's face adopts a dangerous smirk, one that sent chills down both girl's spines. It is a smirk that suggests he is about to have fun at someone else's expense. "I'm the pathetic one, am I? I'm not the one covered in stitches because I tried to cut myself to death. We both know I treated you like shit, Parkinson. And yet you kept coming back, kept crawling back at my call…and I'm the pathetic one?"

Hermione can see Pansy slipping back, reverting back to that self-ashamed and broken person. Merlin be damned if she is going to let that happen.

"How does it feel, Malfoy? To hit a girl, to break her heart into a thousand pieces every day with your words and your actions? How does it feel to be a monster like you?"

"Oh, Granger I see you're feeling better. Well, I'll tell you—the only girl I've ever hit is Pansy here, see don't you feel special my flower? I hit her when I'm pissed, when I'm bored, I hit her when we're fucking. She isn't even human, but she is mine and nobody touches what's mine. And that includes a filthy, disgusting mudblood like you"

"You know what Malfoy? I think you're the pathetic one. You walk around this school like you're the shit and your life is just so fucking perfect. You have nothing, and nobody. You're angry and alone and scared, aren't you Malfoy? And you take it out on Pansy because she's weaker than you are, she can't hit back. She loved you, you arse. She could have helped, if you'd loved her back. If you'd treated her right, she could have saved you. Now it's too late, because we're in love and there's nothing you can say or do to break that. Pansy is strong, and intelligent and funny and beautiful.

I just feel sorry for you Malfoy, that you were too dense to realize that. To appreciate everything she was. Now get out, you slimy little bastard. NOW"

Draco Malfoy doesn't need to be told twice.

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The foul, loathsome, evil little cockroach has been in particularly dangerous mood for the next few weeks. And was given detention for two weeks after he cornered a first year Ravenclaw girl named Lucinda Bogfaller and beat her up. The girl, although shaken, wasn't seriously injured. When Pansy heard she was pissed beyond belief, and the whole school (save for Hermione and Harry) was surprised when she was seen walking arm in arm with the young girl and comforting her.

During their potions class, Slughorn beams at the sight of the two girls holding hands. "Ah, house unity. And now, since we're not moving on to the next chapter until next class. Pansy Parkinson has asked me to allow her the opportunity to give Hermione Granger a very important message. There will be no interruptions of any sort, and to make sure of this I have put a silence charm on everyone but Ms. Granger, Ms. Parkinson, and Mr. Potter."

Pansy walks up to the front of the classroom. "Hello…um…I really love music, which of course everyone does but…I love to write it and…sing it. So I wrote this last week for you, Hermione. I love you so much, you saved me and I…well here it goes"

_For you, there'll be no more crying_

_For you, the sun will be shining_

_And I feel that when I'm with you_

_It's all right, I know it's right_

Pansy's voice is beautiful. Soulful and smooth, she's looking straight at Hermione and everyone knows that this is not a phase that they were going through, it's not hot lesbian action, and it isn't an experiment. It is love. And it is beautiful. Pansy is glowing, she looks very pretty as she sings her heart out and her classmates realize that they were seeing the real Pansy for the first time in a very, very long time. A beautiful and passionate Pansy.

Hermione is proud to say that she was hers. Draco is rolling his eyes and mouthing words like, "Stupid cunt" which are not heard due to Slughorn's spell. Harry is beside Hermione, grinning from ear to ear. The girls in the class are wiping away tears, some hitting their boyfriend (Lavender and Ron) because the boy isn't romantic enough to sing a song for them. (Though if Lavender had heard Ron sing she might have thought twice about that)

_To you, I'll give the world_

_To you, I'll never be cold_

'_cause I feel that when I'm with you_

_It's all right, I know it's right_

Pansy grabs both of Hermione's hands and pulls her close, pressing her forehead against hers lovingly. She pulls away with a smile and walks around, singing her ballad. She is still looking straight at Hermione, nothing can break their gazes. Hermione forms a heart with her fingers and Pansy winks playfully at her. Draco looks ready to kill, Pansy grins at him and blows him a mocking kiss. The girls, including Hermione, all laugh at this. Though hers is the only one that sounds

_And the song birds are singing_

_Like they know the score_

_And I love you, I love you, I love you_

_Like never before_

Hermione's eyes fill with tears and she blows her a sweet kiss. Mouthing the words, "I love you" back to her. Pansy quickly kisses her cheek, the girls all give a silent "awww" and Harry gives an obnoxious but affectionate one as well. Hermione playfully smacks his arm. Ron's usually pissed off state is starting to soften _they are real sweet to each other_ he thinks to himself.

_And I wish you all the love _

_In the world, but most all_

_I wish it from myself _

Hermione thinks she is so beautiful. She thinks there is nobody in the entire world who is half as pretty as her Pansy. And Hell will freeze over first before she ever lets anyone hurt her again, and vice versa. The girls are each other's greatest protectors, when a fifth year Hufflepuff named Jordan Brenville cornered Pansy and sneered at her, "You know, you're really fucking hot. I understand if that Malfoy guy wasn't doing it for you but you didn't need to go running to a dyke bitch. You just need a real man to fix you, baby"

"Get the fuck away from her, now" Hermione growled, her wand pointed and ready.

"You heard her" Harry snarled, his wand also pointed towards him. "Get going, before I do something that _you'll_ regret"

Jordan Breville never bothered them again. And Hermione, being the "absolute devil" as Pansy playfully put it, would occasionally give him threatening glares in the dining hall or in their class.

_And the song birds keep singing_

_Like they know the score_

_And I love you, I love you, I love you_

_Like never before_

"You're so beautiful" Hermione mouths to her, beaming because everything feels so wonderful and right. Nothing is going to tear them apart.

_Like never before_

_Like never before_

Nothing is going to tear them apart.

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**Please Review**!

I hope you enjoyed it, I enjoyed writing it :D Crap, I just realized I switched from writing like this "Pansy looks out the window and admires the flowers of Spring" to "Pansy looked out the window and admired the flowers of Spring" about halfway through the story. HOWEVER, I went back and fixed it. See what I do for you? Now you know the depths of my love :3

~Corina has spoken!

**Is anybody familiar with the song I "sang" during my warning at before the chapter?**


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